I’ve had a problem keeping up this blog. Initially, I started it to have a place to share my thoughts with anyone who cared about reading them. But the problem is that I never think my thoughts are interesting enough. Or at least I can’t make them sound interesting enough with my writing style. I read what Shane writes and I’m so impressed because it is funny and you can tell it has required at least one entertaining thought. I know that I think entertaining thoughts despite the looks I get from Shane sometimes, but I have trouble putting them into words that convey what is really going on in my head. I noticed that I really enjoy when authors write in a way that follows a natural train of thought. But why am I unable to put exactly what I think down in words? I think I stumble too much on trying to make it sound right or be funny or be something that it really isn’t. I try too hard to make it interesting to everyone instead of being assured that my thoughts are interesting enough on their own to merit being shared with the world.

So, I’ve decided to change my writing style. I don’t know exactly how this will work or for how long. But I need to be more free and open when I write instead of so reserved (which is kind of how my personality works sometimes). So, this will be a challenge, but one I am more than ready to face. I am tired of having to think, worry, and toil so much before I write. Why shouldn’t I be able to write out my thoughts exaclty how they come out of my head with no censor?

You might be able to tell, but this is my first attempt at my new writing style. To give it a whirl here a few things I’ve been thinking about lately.

The last week at work has been interesting. First of all, I didn’t even get to tell my team that I was leaving since someone decided to blurt it out for the entire office to hear. I came back from jury duty on Wednesday and everyone already knew. That person is a lot of the reason I am leaving. That person hasn’t even said anything to my face about me leaving, but has made sure to talk about how sad it is that I am leaving loud enough for everyone to hear, but nothing directly to me since she found out. I’ve been getting a strage vibe from people as they come to talk to me about my new job. I can’t tell if they are jealous because I am the one getting out, or if they resent me for leaving since they thought I was a lifer, too.

I want to start growing plants. I want to get some flower pots, soil, and seeds and see what I can do. I think an herb garden would be really fun. But I don’t know if we have enough light anywhere in our apartment to make sure the plants can grow. Shane doesn’t like it when I lift up the blinds and let the sunlight in.

Shane is going to Texas this weekend (leaving Thursday morning) which leaves me at home by myself for 4 days. I don’t know what to do with myself. Some things I’ve been considering: going to the beach, cleaning, reading, playing SimCity, going to the Phantom Gourmet BBQ Beach Party (got free tickets), shopping for clothes for my new “no dress code” job, and doing nothing at all.

I’ve evaluated what I have written above and determined that I still need more practice on this new writing style. I’m pleased with the effort, but I also realize I have more work to do. Hopefully writing more often will help tone my skills.